Lucky to be here....

Hi all, as I write this my heart is fluttering and I feel sick in the stomach, and I just want to lay down and cry, because of how lucky we are and because of how close we came to something that I don't even want to consider.  On our way home from our trip to Brisbane,  Shane fell asleep at the wheel about 15 minutes away from home.  The kids and I were all asleep, the radio was on, and we woke to the sound of the car slamming into a bank on the side of the road, and trees looming in the view of the windscreen, we were going pretty fast because I think Shanes foot was still on the accelerator as he was trying to wake up and figure out what was going on.  I grabbed the wheel to push the car back into the road, and we were able to just avoid the bigger gums.  Summer was screaming with fright, and just thinking about it now,  I can't get the sound of that metal slamming, out of my head.  I think we were very lucky that it happened where it did, and that we are in a big four wheel drive car, with bull bar.  We are all fine, no injuries, and considering what we hit,  quite minor damage to the car.  We are all in shock.  I awoke at about 3.30 this morning and could not get my mind to stop repeating the scenario, as I experienced it, I can't get it out of my head.  I am still frightened.  My biggest fear is a car accident, and although we are all safe, it is hard to not play over those what ifs.  I thanked  the universe, my grandparents, god, whoever was looking out for us, that we did not die, kill or seriously injure ourselves or anyone else yesterday, and how close we came is something that we will not forget easily or quickly.  But most of all I feel so bad for Shane.  He is devastated, at what he could have done to his family, when he knew he was tired.  He didn't read the signs his body was telling him, even though he said he knew he should have pulled over, because he was struggling to stay awake.    But today we are here, at home together, a normal day.  This day for us could have been so different, our lives could have changed irrevocably forever.